Claire is single
22nd April 2008
Claire is single. Are you? If so, then take this quiz.
-50 has a rat tail
-25 has hair longer than 3.5 inches at the longest strand
-40 hair can be tied into a ponytail
-20 going bald or shaves head
+5 none of the above
-50 total tattooed area over 6 square inches
-15 tattoo at discreet spot and under 6 square inches
+5 no tattoo(s)
-10 has a single ear piercing
-15 has more than one ear piercing
-50 has more than just ear piercing
+5 no piercing(s)
-15 has a mustache
-20 has a beard
-50 has excessively long (more than 1 cm long facial hair)
+5 no facial hair
-25 shorter than Claire (5 ft. 4.5 inches)
+0 between 0 and 4 inches taller than Claire
+10 between 4 and 7 inches taller than Claire
-5 seven or more inches taller than Claire
-25 squeezable belly fat greater than 1 cm
-20 all skin and bones
+10 somewhere between the above two
+10 slight but noticeable muscle mass
+0 huge super-athletic muscles
-25 man boobs
-10 disgusting hands
-15 bad breath
-30 crooked teeth
-25 anything else potentially disgusting to the average girl that is not listed
-50 has tried illegal drugs on more than one occasion (excluding age-restricted drugs)
-25 smokes cigarettes/chews tobacco
-15 smokes a legal product other than cigarettes
+5 drinks moderately no more than once per week
-10 drinks more than per week but not alcoholic
-50 alcoholic
+0 doesn’t drink
+20 IQ between 125 and 160
-10 IQ above 160
-10 IQ between 100 and 125
-50 IQ under 100
-50 does not have the capacity to graduate from college
+15 has a similar major and can help Claire study
-25 has a major that will most likely make him end up in a cardboard box
-20 Born after November 12, 1990
-20 Born before November 12, 1986
+5 Born on or between November 12, 1986 and November 12, 1990
-50 cannot cook beyond using a microwave/cereal/sandwich making
+10 can cook fine cuisine
+5 can somewhat cook but is not an expert
-50 reckless driving/has gotten more than one ticket
-25 doesn’t have a driver’s license
+15 can drive Claire around in NY
+10 plays video games occasionally and does not mind losing to a girl in guitar hero
-20 obsessively plays video games (i.e. stays up all night to play after getting a new one)
+10 slightly germaphobic
-10 obsessively germaphobic
+20 hates berries
+5 mildly dislikes berries
+20 allergic to berries
-40 the left 15% of the liberal/conservative spectrum
-35 the right 15% of the spectrum
+5 middle 50% of the spectrum
+0 anywhere on the spectrum
-1000000 female
-999999 bisexual
Gay? Close the browser.
+100 took the whole test and calculated a score
unavailable: -current score if score is positive
Positive score – I’m asking you out with this note
-25 to 0 – Possible if you’re hot
Under -25 – Don’t even think about it
Edit: Wow, what started out as a joke really generated heated discussion. This was my most popular note on facebook yet (and my only note).
Jennifer Smith:
seriously?
no.
Tim Atchison:
ATTN: Jennifer
You are a whorebag and nobody loves you. Also, you are adopted. I guess that’s funny too.
That is all.
Also, I got -90. SO WE’RE DATING NOW WOOOOOOOOOOOOO
\O_o/
Katie Jackson:
My brother would get a +35 , and that’s BEFORE adding 100 for me completing the test and calculating his score…But, I’m serious about long-distance relationships
Tim Atchison:
T_T
Me:
are you serious? Maybe I need to meet him. The reason I have the +100 thing is because people who choose to take it should typically (except Tim) be at least somewhat interested, right? That’s a plus in itself.
Tim Atchison:
-90.
Just think about it.
Solomon Wontaek Lim:
lol i like your standards =)
Me:
Can anyone who chooses to take the quiz themselves and get the bonus get any lower?:-D
Why do I have a feeling that a high score on this quiz means nothing?
Solomon Wontaek Lim:
i know why, its because u could have some crazily disgusting features and still score high, u should change the passing criteria to a perfect score haha
David Hall:
Lol I broke even at 0 Claire but IF you add the bonus of +100 for taking it then you can guess what mine would be
Nelson Hua:
How come there’s so many -40 and -50 and no +40 or +50, just + 5 or +10? It’s hard to get over +25 then.
Heh, and where’s the - something for being Asian? haha
Me:
Claire Chiang wrote
at 3:54pm
I think I need to amend this a little.
So many big minuses and really small pluses, so there can only be about one thing wrong. I would have put the - something for being Asian, but that would be publicly announcing that I’m racist against my own race.
-25 anything else potentially disgusting to the average girl that is not listed
-1000000 female
-999999 bisexual
Gay? Close the browser.
Kenneth Lan:
I suppose there are merits to the idea of quickly and efficiently screening the universe of possible partners by putting all your standards up front (bigotry and other negative screens included). Some of your criteria sound like you’re looking for more utility than romance, though…which may not be an attractive idea to many people. And why are you in a hurry to find a partner? You have at least a few years.
Me:
It was more of a joke that I was discussing with my friends at dinner, and for some reason I actually put it in to action. From this, I learned that numbers can’t properly be assigned to datability (I doubt that’s a word).
Clare Finnegan:
I’m going to follow the general trend and post in a note I have not been tagged in. Claire, you’re awesome. Also I want to know what on earth is being implied by “at least a few years”? Look, buddy, Claire is going to be very “datable” her entire life.
So, the bottom line was that numbers do not work with everything. If only they did, life would be so much more simple. On a brighter (or darker) note, I might start updating my blog again. Of course, I also said the same thing the last time I posted (several months ago).
